Follow These Guidelines

To protect yourself and others, experts now recommend that you:

1. Wash your hands frequently
2. Maintain a social distance of at least six feet
3. Cover your nose and mouth
4. Ignore the President of the United States completely

"The best thing you can do right now is practice common sense," said one infectious disease expert. "Stay inside. Wash your hands. And do not listen to a f--king word the President says." He added, "And not necessarily in that order."

Stay safe! Stay informed. And if you see Trump stay the hell away.